R.I.P. First Homemade Paddle

Well, this is a first for us. I have been having a very very stressful time at work. Stress translate into sexual energy for me and I have felt the need to be spanked lately...a LOT. I'm just now getting brave enough to ask a little more often. I asked a few days ago when we went to the hotel room. That was great. I asked last night before I went to work. Ouchy. But it was good. I asked again this morning. I am trying to learn to be tough so when he said he was going to give me 5 swats with the homemade holey paddle, I didn't argue it. It was painful but it was good. He liked the nice warmth and red glow he had created. But then he decided it wasn't quite enough. He thought I needed a couple more swats on each side. Who was I to argue? I asked for it...the rest of it is up to him. He swatted my left side 2 more times. I clenched up but I survived it. Then he gave me two more swats on the right side. I'm pretty sure he had more swatting in mind but suddenly I hear "Oh my God!" coming from behind me. I didn't know what to think, having never heard that particular tone before and especially when he has one hand on my shoulder to hold me down (which usually means I'm going to be hurting) and the other hand is wailing away on my ass. I stood up to look. Lo! and Behold! He broke the paddle on my ass! This is the first time that this happened to us. I think it scared hubby just a little. I was kind of excited. But now... we have to get another paddle with holes in hit. This, I have a feeling, means that Bruiser and I are going to be getting to know each other very well between now and then. My Honey sure loves Bruiser. I'm getting used to it. I know what to expect most of the time. I have to admit, when my love drags out Bruiser, I get a great sense of dread. As I bend over, usually over the trunk in our bedroom, I am mostly okay...apprehensive but okay...Once he places the palm of his hand on my back, I get really nervous. This always means the swats are going to be hard. I'm such a wimp and such a dichotomy. On the one hand, I always beg him to stop, at the very least give me a little break every 3 swats or so before going on,which he kindly allows me. On the other hand, I WANT that God awful pain that makes me want to leap out of my skin. Even when I'm pouting and telling him its too much, just those little breaks for him to massage my ass until the overwhelming sting eases just a little is usually enough and then I want more. And more...and more...good thing we are still experimenting. My heart is broken over that one. But I'm awfully proud of it too. You will see its not a deadly paddle, not like Bruiser, but it was certainly a formidible one and I'm going to miss it much...I have begun to look for possible replacements that my Love can alter to my (and his) satisfaction. See what a fine job my little buddy, my sweet gift from my husband did? And why is my right cheek bruises so much better than my left? Honey has even tried concentrating on my the left side (which I wasn't very happy about) to try to even out the bruising but it just doesn't work that way. Anyway, like I said earlier, this probably means Bruiser is going to be brought out even more often and the marks aren't nearly as varied and Bruiser hurts a lot more. Oh well, just a really good excuse to buy a new spanker toy!